Wednesday, July 20, 2011

packing memories

this is one of those posts where I want to list what I want to reflect upon before I forget it....hopefully in August I will be able to actually write...

I am sitting in the only free wi-fi spot in Western North Dakota....a coffee house named "Daily Addiction" cute name, but my chai was made from powder--powder, and then hot water poured in.   Sigh.  I guess I shouldn't expect so much when the county courthouse cafe is the best lunch spot in town, right?

Packing up my parent's house  has been a trip.   This is a house I grew up in--from third grade on.   I was sneaking around in the basement last night---I've stashed a bottle of wine in the downstairs fridge which is in the laundry room, and when I opened the door to the laundry room, it creaked.  It creaked just like it did thirty years ago when I was in high school.   It's funny how many memories a creaky door evokes---as a little kid, I would sneak to that fridge to steal Christmas cookies (o.k., I did that as an adult, too)....and then there was the summer I was dating a much older man who was working in the oil fields, and sneaking down the stairs that still creak with the same sound as the laundry room door.  Any way, I want to write more about the creaks.

And I want to write about the memories thrown into the dumpster--my barbie doll case with only Ken remaining in it; and the oil paintings I painted as a teenager, and the piano lesson music, and all of the jars my mother has saved for, oh, about 40 years, and the missing things, like the elm trees in the backyard that created so much havoc because it dropped so many twigs and my stepfather was never satisfied at how we cleaned them up, and the electric frying pan that my mom would fry liver in that I was made to eat, and I would gag it down because if I didn't it would be world war three.....

and then, how old they forgetful and tender and vulnerable they both mom and my they bicker and yet they are each other's anchors in spite of....losing their minds (literally) and being scared of this move more than they let on, and yet the ball is rolling and there is no turning back...which is good....and how I want to just wrap them up in my arms and want to tell them that I  am going to take care of them, and not to worry, but I worry too, but I will, and my sisters will take care of them, no doubt.....

Really, though, I came to do a little work on my sermon for Sunday.   So...for now, I will let all of this rest, and finish my powdery chai.

I really look forward to Starbucks on Saturday in Boston.

Wednesday, July 6, 2011


note:  I just embarrassingly posted this at the RGBP place for prayer.  So glad I caught it in the same minute and deleted it.  it is deleted, right?

thought list.

I've been back from vacation for a few days....I led worship/preached on Sunday while jetlagged (in a serious way---I told my congo that if my words slurred it wasn't because I had imbibed in any early morning cocktails, but that it felt like 3 in the morning to my body)....

Then I enjoyed the 4th...and yesterday was the first day back in the office. Caught up on emails, tried to discern the status of a serious pastoral situation, and then around 3:30 headed over to Whole Foods to get a little light lunch which turned into the Devil Food, and not in a good way. (I know, I have mentioned this on Twitter and Facebook, which makes it true.  I am a certifiable Drama Princess.  Not quite queen material yet, but I am working on it.)  Thing is,  I haven't lost my cookies like that since I was a kid.  Oof.

Which is to say,  after feeling like crap for about 18 hours, now I am just left over and don't feel like anything, but know that I need to get a leg up for Sunday worship.

But I have a list of posts to write, or thoughts to explore, so I am going to list them here, so that hopefully when I am all chipper and ready to ponder, I will remember what it was I wanted to think about out loud on the page.
1.  Wiggy--a tribute to my little dog that we needed to put down on Sunday
2. Swimming with dolphins.  and herds of fish and turtles.
3. Aloha spirit, and the spiritual depth of hawaii.
4.  Wild chickens and roosters in Kauai
5.  The meaning of the ecumenical baptism agreement that Synod approved (or whatever).
6.  Personal group emails--this is a good one.
7.  Pastoring sick people in New England.
8.  My parents moving out of their home after living in it for 40 years, and moving to Minnesota after living their whole lives in one town.
9.  My call.  That's ongoing.
10.  sermons and podcasts.
11.  probably other stuff too, but can't remember right now.

I have parked myself at Starbucks for a little while.   After sipping my coffee, wondering if this was a good idea.  Oh well.

What are YOU thinking about?