Disappointment

I am not sure if Jesus felt disappointment during his last days,
but it seems to be an appropriate sentiment
for the next few days.

At least, that is where I am at in my heart.
Huge disappointment prevails,
and I need to walk with it the next few days,
attend to it,
and not let it embitter me,
but allow it
to move through me,
rest in me,
and hopefully
find release.

I am not feeling forsaken,
but a bit of desolate abandonment
is spilled in little dank puddles in my soul,
the kind that don't dry up in the sun right away
after a rain,
the ones that  sit there, and get clogged with oil and broken bits of leaves and dead bugs.

A spiritual issue,
a spiritual pining and wondering...
and sadness.

May I uncover the Holy in this slog of journey the next few days.

Amen.