wow. Friday Five Randomness!

Today, over at RevGals,  I wrote...
Can you believe it is April 12????  Have you finished your taxes?  Here in Boston, the city is abuzz with Boston Marathon anticipation.  We are finally hearing birds chirp in the morning, and even though it was in the low thirties last night, many of us are bravely sporting open-toed sandals.   None of this has anything to do Friday Five, except randomness.   So, in that spirit.......

1.  How are you doing?  What's going on in your life?
Well, the big thing is that I resigned from my position as associate pastor at a church I have served for the last six years.  I did this for a multiplicity of reasons, but I don't have a position to go to.  So, there is risk involved. 

2.  Have you ever resigned from a position?  What was the good-bye like?
Yes, all of them!  All of the good-byes, though, have been amazing, and deep and lasting.  And HARD. 

3. So, we are still resurrecting...still getting used to New Life!!  What is a source of new life for you?
I sound like a broken record, but the pottery studio on Fridays is like Sabbath to me. It renews my heart and soul and mind.  My hilarious animals.  
4.  My friend is running the marathon on Friday, because it is on her bucket list.  What is something on your bucket list? 
Truly, I want to live in Hawaii.  We have it on our life plan.  I love it there.  Other than that, I still haven't seen the  musicals Wicked or The Lion King. I was just thinking about that today. 

5.  Tell us the story of something precious you carry around with you, rests on your desk or altar. 
This could be a book.  But I will just name three.  First, I have my mother's High School ring.  I never wear it, but I love it.  Second, My stepfather's bowling team picture when they went to the American Bowling Congress Championships in St. Paul, MN in 1965!   Three, a tiny pinch pot that I made from clay from Jordan Lake in North Carolina, and fired in a wood firing in a metal trash can.  

On a final note, I am embarrassed I haven't blogged since December.   I think I have had a lot of unbloggable stuff that found its way into my journals.    I shall do better. I shall!

just some randomness...

such as:

It's beautiful today in Boston--40 ish, clear blue skies....but it is December. Shouldn't it be cold?

Finding gifts for elderly parents is hard.   Really hard. 

I am going to learn to micro-macrame bracelets and necklaces with pottery beads that I make.  Wish me luck. 

Yesterday, I was full of angst around professional matters.   Even though some kind of change is imminent (sp?) I decided that I just have to GO for it in this next round, and see what happens.   So, I am all. in.  No ambivalence.  (At least in this current hour, heh heh!)

I am on a Greek Salad for lunch everyday thing.   Too bad feta cheese isn't vegan.   Oh well.

I lost the keys to my car, and never found them.  This never happens.  I always lose things, and then find them.

One of my committees at church gave me a beautiful mug for the holidays.  It is by far my favorite mug in the world, and the colors are brown, turquoise, red, and gold.   If I had it handy, I would take a picture.  

What fun stuff do you have planned for the holidays, besides maybe some down time in pajamas all day?

I have a gajillion things I ought to be doing, but am not.

Tuesday, I had a "last lunch" with one of my dear friends who is getting married and moving far away.  It is such a joyful time, yet I am going to miss our rendesvous (spelling.)  Note:  I did not have a greek salad.  Instead, portobello mushroom swiss panini.  And a skinny peppermint latte for dessert.

My beloved broke three ribs in a bad fall.  I feel so bad for the amount of pain she is experiencing. Wish I could fix it.   Percoset helps, though.

How ever on earth do you keep up with all the filing?

Time for me to do some of that.

Or not.   Maybe I will go and find some  thread to test my micro-macrame idea.  Volunteer gifts, right?

What's up with you?

contemplation....or....stressing?

In this season of advent, I am focused on my breathing. 
My monkey mind is all a jumpin' all around,
and all that settles it is breathing.  

I vacillate non-anxious, non-attachment one moment,
to
well, stress, worry, wondering, persiverating on what is out of my control, although I do have input.  I just don't get to know--yet--how the input is perceived. 

I am grateful for the contemplative, quiet breathing moments. 

I want to honor the worried confused part of me that feels like I am at the mercy of other's whims.
I want to hold that part of me, with my non-anxious self, and let her have her feelings......because if this were someone else, that is what I would do. 

Amen.

Conflicted.

Tomorrow, I solemnize a marriage with a civil ceremony.
One of the couple is like a sibling and dear friend.
The other--I met once, and experienced rudeness.
So.. As a friend...I do the ceremony, and grieve the loss of my friend.

I thought we were adults by now...

Sexist.

I must admit.
I have caught myself doing what I hate...but at least I caught myself, right?

Here is the thing.  I was watching the news, and  Hilary Clinton's photo came up, and said to myself,
"ugh, I hate her hair. It looked so much better shorter."
Then, the other night, when Candy Crowly was moderating the debate, I looked at here and said to myself, "Ugh. Candy? Really? Spiral curls?  Not a good look."

And then, I stopped.

If Candy and Hilary wear their hair long, curly, ponytails, who cares? 

The other day, my colleague and I were at an event, and a young woman was dressed in a nice jacket and incredibly short skirt (as I think is the fashion these days).  It was a young fashionista polished look.  Here's the thing, though, she was a largish young woman, and the the short skirt , well, revealed a lot of heavy legs.    I thought to myself, "Not a good look for you, honey..."

And then I stopped.

I reframed my thought, and said to myself (o.k. yes, I do talk a lot to myself....but isn't the perogative of middle age?), "Good for her for having the confidence to rock her look."

I don't know about you, but I feel like, as women, we   need to support what is on the inside of our sisters.  I need to be better at this...because we are all socialized to look at the outside in order to assess the whole person.  

Don't get me wrong, I love to pick out clothes, I love to don my bracelets and earrings, and pick out lip-gloss.   But if I show up wearing baggy pants, ruffled hair, and a shade of lipstick that doesn't really favor my coloring, it makes no difference of who I am on the inside.  A strong, capable, proud, beautiful person with depth and integrity. 

That's what I need to remember when I encounter people--go beyond the skin.  To wonder at the inner life of someone.  To think to myself, wow, "Candy Crowley, I wonder what it is like to be you right now--moderating a presidential debate!  Did you ever think when you were 16 that this is what you might do someday?"

So, I am going to work on my inner-sexist critic thing.   And celebrate confidence and character in women...and men. 

And that's it for now!

Friday Five!

Whoopsie! Friday Five

random photo of Daisy dog

Isn't Daisy cute?  She turns 15 in November!   
Wow, how is it that it is the second Friday of October, already??
I don't know about you, but this fall has been incredibly FULL, and time is flying faster than I can keep track of it!

So, first things first.
Take a moment, and take 5 deep slow breaths...
One....
Two...
Three...
Four...
Five....
Yep, I did it again.  It's going to be a breathing kind of weekend.   

Well, I feel more centered now.
So, let's get on with a Random Friday Five.
1. Tell us a moment of blessing that you have experienced in the past week.

Well, it's hard to pick one, but yesterday my colleague and I went to the assisted living center next to our church to lead Protestant worship and only one lady showed up.  We visited with her and then shared communion together.  It was a simple sweet blessing.   Her smile and laugh were gentle and sincere.   

2. Share the first thing/story that comes to mind when you read "When I was a child..."

My friend Vanessa and I would spend all day building Barbie doll mansions out of  blankets and furniture in her rec room in the basement.  By the time we finished, we ran out of time to actually PLAY Barbies.  
3, 4, and 5. If you were the host of a t.v. talk show, what three people would you like to interview on your first show, and what would you ask them.

I would definitely invite Sylvia the Pet Psychic and have her talk to my cats and dogs that I have adopted to find out what their stories were before I got them from the shelter, street.....

Then I would interview the Property Brothers from HGTV, and have them help  me redesign my kitchen.  

Finally, I would interview the Dalai Lama, because I am bummed that he is speaking at the tiny Tibetan Buddhist Center two blocks from my home but it's a closed event.   I would just ask him to share his heart wisdom.  

Clearly, the name of my talk show would be, "All About Me"  (shaking my head at myself....)

So it's September 4.
School has started, and I am hopelessly not ready for the fall.
My programming is in a bit of disarray (and that's really being generous.)
Lots of odds and ends to shape up, and
my feelings are mixed--energetic, pulled back, old hat, confident, and procrastinating.
Not sure those are feelings, but it's how I am wearing my skin today as I enter into the week.

On my printer, I have taped these words:
"God grant me the grace not to shake up the world on your behalf,
but to get the people around me to do it, too.  Amen."

Shake me up God,
so I can shake it up for you...
Shake me up, God,
so I can ignite those around me to shake up the world with me, with You,
to be excited and joyful and loving and grateful
in the ministry we do together.

Shake us up, God.
Amen.