Reading week with no reading.

So, I decided to take this week as one of my study/professional development weeks, of which I have two. My plan was to read several books, outline the upcoming women's retreat that I am leading, do some pottery, and relax.

I finished one book. Yay! I did some pottery--and will do more--yay!

But the house has been anything but relaxing as we are on the fourth week of the bathroom remodel. I get continual calls and questions--things that need to be tended to, and it's all noisy, and yes I can go to the coffee shop or something, but that isn't what I need. I need peace. Quiet. Me and doggies and kitties, you know?

Wah, wah, I know. At least I am off, and doing things I love.

Back to reading, and no more whining.

chicken procrastination.

Okay,
so...I really should be gathering an agenda for a meeting tonight, and finish up some other loose ends but why work so far ahead?

Back to chicken.

I cook for the dogs. First, it is more economical. Second, the less stuff added means healthier food, I think. Now, please note: I am a 90% vegetarian. I don't like meat, it grosses me out, and I have never craved it. However, if you invite me over to your house for dinner and serve me a piece of chicken cooked with love, I will enjoy it. Because, I want your love!!

For awhile, I was cooking ground turkey, because it was easy and not too gross. Then, I started to think about the hazards of ground meat, so I switched to boiling frozen chicken breasts. But then, how wrong is that? Chickens bred for their boobs? What about the rest of the chicken? So...this week, my conscience got the best of me, and I roasted a big chicken. Still not the best, humane choice because it wasn't free range, and the wings in proportion to other parts didn't look right, but it's the best I could do. Dogs are carnivores.

Picking apart the chicken about did me in. The dogs, however went nuts. They loved the skin. (yeewwww). Combined with some peas and brown rice---they have got it made.

I just wish there were a better way to live. I hate how our culture processes food--all food--the stuff in the grocery store. I wish I could do a Barbara Kingsolver and live off the land--well, I could if I chose to. That's not my point. I'm not sure what my point is--I am just amusing here....I just wish we all could (myself first) live more humanely and lightly on the planet, and with each other.

Thank you roasted chicken, for giving such delight to my animal friends.

God help me, help us, amen.

Chicken.

While I was walking Fenway today along the Mystic River, my thoughts traveled around lazily...I would try to meditate, and then I started thinking about yesterday or what would happen later today...and then I would focus back on breathing, and then I would stop...and just stare at the snow coming down.

The snow today is perfect. Quietly falling from the sky...collecting, and then melting with just a swoosh of a mitten...

I thought about the hour I just spent from 7-8 am today...I just sort watched news, played with doggies, talked to the contractor, not doing anything with real intention or focus...just sort of being but not fully aware. Or maybe that is awareness.

I also laughed at myself as we trudged through the snow to get to the voting place...I thought to myself, if I were animal, I think I would be a sloth. They stay in bed (in the tree) all the time, and just come down to go to the bathroom. I think they eat up there, in those trees, too.
I could live life from my bed...I am perfectly content to laze around all day...stare at snow, watch birds, watch Ellen, read a little, scritch doggies and cats.

Anyway, what I was going to write about was chicken. I roasted a chicken yesterday for the dogs' food. I will have to write more about it later. So, chicken later, sloth now--or at least until I pull on those sneakers to do a little elliptical exercizing.

Wednesday...

Today,
Penny the foster came to work with me. She is still here, in fact, while I write from my office. She is the best car dog ever. She loves watching traffic and pedestrians.....It's nice to have her around. Too bad she chases cats. With relish.

I don't have my pastor-goo going on today...I went to the hospital to visit a very dear, dear member who has been in and out and in out of the hospital all fall. Seriously, like every other week. She was obviously on a lot of pain medication, and I tried to find out from her what was going on this time---but she didn't know. She didn't know anything, except for where it hurt in her body. So frustrating, because I can't ask the nurses what is going on, I can't ask at the nursing home where she stays, and we are pretty much her family--the church. My colleague will be able to find out, but that isn't the point. The point is that I think that i totally did not meet her in the time of need. We chatted (well, I chatted), I read some scripture to her, and prayed over her and with her. It was fine, but I didn't feel it, you know?

And then the nursing home service just took it down to another level. Thank goodness there was another congregant with me to play the piano and sing the hymns. It just felt so straw-y to be going through a communion liturgy...it didn't seem to meet them where they are at. Again, it was fine. I didn't feel it, and I am not so sure they did either. Oh well. A day in the life of ministry.

Confirmation next. I'm keeping my fingers crossed to "feel it".

I went to visit a parishioner in the hospital today.

oneeleventwentyten. monday.

A home day for me. Am waiting for the appliance repair person to arrive to fix the washing machine, and waiting for the computer repair guy to call to schedule a tune-up and fix-up, am listening to the plumber upstairs pounding and squeaking away to get all the pipes up to grade and to code so we can re-commence with the remodeling joy. He's a good guy, the plumber. If we ever need one again (hah!) I would totally call him.

So, the doggies have been walked, the kitchen cleaned, mopped, scrubbed...I've run a couple of errands and now will run across the street to finish a load of laundry, play with Penny the foster dog....

And..then, exercise, then do some pottery and read and just chill.

Nothing exciting. I will say I am little down today--maybe it is just winter blues. I am glad the sun is shining, in spite of the cold.

So, God...be a blanket of presence and warmth around me today. Help me live with intention and love into the gift of this day. Help me honor what is in my heart, but help me to also not give in to the low mood in a way that blocks me...but help me to be gentle with myself, aware, and kind.

Thank you. Thank you. Thank you. Amen.

Live Bright

The following blog post is totally lifted from my friend Jess' blog. You can go to her blog:
Click here or read it below. However, her post has an adorable picture of her daughter, living bright!

You are the light of the world
--Jess Wilson
But if that light is under a bushel, then it’s lost somethin’ kind of crucial

You’ve got to stay bright to be the light of the world

So let your light so shine before men

Let your light so shine

~ Light of the World, from Godspell

*

Godspell is playing on the television in our den – again. Kendall bounces past me – making her rounds of the room while watching the show.

“Mama, how do I be the light of the world?” she asks.

“What’s that honey?”

“How do I be the light of the world?”

I’m not sure what she’s asking me. I know it’s from the song that’s playing as we speak, but I can’t focus on the lyrics and I don’t remember the next line. Of course there’s no point in trying to guess when she’s looking for a specific answer to a question.

“I don’t know, Kenz. How do you be the light of the world?” I ask - mangling the English language.

She smiles as she answers, “I live bright.”

Script or no, the line gets me.

This child SHINES from within. She vibrates with energy. When she smiles, a river of warmth flows into the room.

As she watches TV, I watch her. I can’t take my eyes off of her, but I have to once in a while so my heart won’t explode. I swear sometimes it’s like staring straight into the sun.

When she’s here – when she’s really here – her eyes are ablaze with light. You can even see it in photos. Her eyes glow.

Maybe it’s just me. Maybe it’s the reflection of the flash. Either way, my child is proof positive for me of God’s existence.

I fold her into my arms on the next pass.

“Oh honey, child,” I say. ”You sure do.”

January 4...

Monday, Monday...
Wow. The holidays flew by me, and I can't believe I haven't sat down to just do some writing. Or blogging. I have decided, though, that I need to do more, because I feel like I have lost my writing edge--not preaching every week has seriously hindered what I used to do fairly well.

But, for today, I don't have much to say. My best thoughts seem to wake me up in the middle of the night...and when I remember them in the morning they don't seem nearly as interesting. Maybe that's why they are called dreams!


I am taking the day off...we have started a bathroom remodel and it is very, very, very loud and freaking all of us out--the animals and me. It's a little disconcerting to sit through the pounding and see your bathroom carried outside two five pound buckets at a time. Of course, when those walls come down, more issues emerge. Such as---thin walls, pipes where you hoped you didn't have them and no vents where you need to have them. That all adds up to: MORE MONEY and MORE DAYS without a shower. Go the the gym you say? Hah! I don't have a membership but perhaps this is the month. I hear there are specials.

January is looking like it will be fairly full and busy. How is that possible?

What else. Oh. Maybe this is TMI, but I thought peri-menopause meant menses less often. I am currently on a 20 day schedule. Can that be right? I find it a little irritating. Oh well.

OH!!! The biggest, loveliest thing of all is that Beloved and I celebrate 7 years of commitment TODAY. Go us!

Off to scavenge for lunch.